Well I laid it down and let go and let God for one whole day before I picked it right back up again! How frustrating is that. This morning Jordans Iv blew again. He cried, he did not want to be stuck again. Dr Kendall said we needed to restart it but Jordan did not want that. So he could either restart it or go home on half the medication and fight the nausea and the retching until they talked to Erlanger in the morning. Of course Jordan chose to go home, I mean how many kids do you know that would stick out there arm and say here you go give me an IV please.
Im the mom I knew in my heart that he should stay I knew in my gut he should stay, its the right thing for him right now, its where he should be, the doctors felt that way to. How can I make a wrong decision instead of doing what I know to be right. I know Jordan wants to be home, but Im supposed to be following where I feel the most peace at. And I let my mommy feelings get in the way. Now im sick, Im nausous, and I knwo I have made a wrong decision. All I can do is pray for forgiveness, hope this doctor gets him in tomorrow and hope Jordans night is as good as he hopes it will be.
Trying to lay it down again :(
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